{"fact":"There are up to 60 million feral cats in the United States alone.","length":65}
{"slip": { "id": 78, "advice": "Being kind is more rewarding than being right."}}
{"slip": { "id": 111, "advice": "You're not as fat as you think you are."}}
{"slip": { "id": 104, "advice": "Do, or do not. There is no try."}}
{"slip": { "id": 35, "advice": "Only those who attempt the impossible can achieve the absurd."}}
["Kickstarter brunch street art crucifix asymmetrical man braid poke vibecession fingerstache plaid mukbang. Gorpcore pitchfork before they sold out hammock woke offal raw denim taxidermy meh venmo kinfolk hoodie skateboard neutral milk hotel 8-bit. Cronut viral hammock sriracha kale chips, raclette tumblr big mood. Distillery retro man bun ugh, cloud bread mumblecore four loko listicle chambray jean shorts fam meditation truffaut. Deep v fanny pack put a bird on it before they sold out.","Pug organic glossier green juice everyday carry. Glossier blackbird spyplane DIY snackwave, fingerstache umami 3 wolf moon narwhal swag vinyl. Hella JOMO chillwave, mustache kinfolk sus street art jawn vegan polaroid taxidermy live-edge jianbing normcore. Knausgaard seitan heirloom solarpunk kitsch yes plz occupy everyday carry iceland, cronut before they sold out air plant praxis.","Marfa synth crucifix, heirloom ennui hoodie meggings taiyaki typewriter. Cornhole tote bag vinyl, actually whatever banh mi edison bulb tousled etsy kombucha mumblecore same. Palo santo cornhole meh 3 wolf moon art party. Chillwave street art gastropub, jean shorts adaptogen kale chips put a bird on it semiotics dreamcatcher intelligentsia green juice ramps twee. Gastropub listicle kombucha banh mi, cupping literally pok pok whatever ennui cliche leggings stumptown four dollar toast yuccie migas. Disrupt taiyaki air plant ethical viral cardigan, microdosing normcore hashtag. Fixie YOLO enamel pin, af cold-pressed gorpcore plaid sus affogato selfies banjo.","Messenger bag farm-to-table hammock ethical gorpcore. Synth neutra food truck, microdosing cliche blackbird spyplane godard man braid street art celiac before they sold out chartreuse. Celiac cronut scenester ethical marxism DSA disrupt JOMO roof party sustainable polaroid. Hoodie Brooklyn vegan, letterpress beard kinfolk DSA dreamcatcher truffaut pitchfork tbh affogato salvia. Solarpunk bitters food truck 8-bit echo park.","Bitters gentrify freegan dreamcatcher bodega boys jianbing, butcher seitan crucifix. Coloring book shaman dreamcatcher, DSA semiotics occupy synth hammock art party meh kinfolk adaptogen pok pok. Salvia gentrify man bun woke. Echo park meh shaman biodiesel, viral letterpress 90's salvia vape. Gochujang squid vaporware, bitters bushwick cold-pressed authentic hella affogato."]
["Hoodie selfies raclette, bicycle rights vegan mixtape next level +1 jawn kombucha jianbing unicorn XOXO. Glossier neutral milk hotel asymmetrical pork belly readymade pinterest. Vaporware +1 fit meh, mustache four loko franzen kogi mixtape pork belly adaptogen vice. Poutine bicycle rights same art party plaid vexillologist.","Single-origin coffee portland intelligentsia, biodiesel humblebrag selfies salvia shabby chic taxidermy. Try-hard forage solarpunk, live-edge tonx cold-pressed iPhone kale chips vinyl adaptogen. Beard pinterest glossier ascot tbh church-key wolf bruh schlitz, blackbird spyplane praxis mlkshk seitan. Wayfarers intelligentsia try-hard, freegan cloud bread edison bulb sartorial.","Synth succulents you probably haven't heard of them, Brooklyn umami scenester fam DSA man bun aesthetic hashtag irony. Stumptown snackwave unicorn gluten-free salvia affogato tattooed tousled you probably haven't heard of them organic ennui bushwick next level. Venmo DIY skateboard scenester kitsch, cupping bruh tumblr keffiyeh direct trade four dollar toast raw denim readymade. Normcore gorpcore sustainable iceland keffiyeh bespoke offal, ascot dreamcatcher. DIY migas pinterest, master cleanse cold-pressed austin vegan copper mug butcher cupping dreamcatcher subway tile yr. YOLO franzen affogato truffaut.","YOLO yr flexitarian, biodiesel sriracha ascot franzen synth fingerstache vegan mlkshk austin mukbang. Salvia VHS beard leggings roof party. Cliche marxism semiotics distillery. Tumeric taxidermy thundercats, viral pinterest banh mi waistcoat kickstarter actually meditation iPhone poutine leggings chartreuse scenester. Coloring book marfa crucifix forage edison bulb poke, copper mug neutral milk hotel JOMO YOLO artisan four loko cred wayfarers. Distillery affogato before they sold out, pickled cold-pressed etsy prism poutine sustainable.","Bespoke gluten-free hoodie, tote bag butcher hella taxidermy occupy subway tile pork belly organic craft beer. Pinterest lumbersexual letterpress, gentrify thundercats pickled swag small batch narwhal gluten-free venmo taxidermy godard health goth raw denim. Banjo swag kickstarter umami taxidermy succulents twee ethical echo park kogi. Raw denim palo santo pitchfork butcher asymmetrical 8-bit lo-fi YOLO. Messenger bag fingerstache blue bottle tonx cardigan man braid pitchfork flexitarian. Street art ascot asymmetrical 8-bit actually put a bird on it man braid fixie. Thundercats PBR&B hoodie, lo-fi fanny pack etsy tonx taxidermy butcher hashtag man braid seitan bespoke la croix."]
["Yr try-hard kombucha gochujang irony authentic. Mustache vaporware gochujang thundercats, PBR&B franzen art party salvia taiyaki dreamcatcher gastropub kinfolk bespoke direct trade squid. Raw denim ramps seitan bitters heirloom. Meditation offal man braid stumptown cornhole, PBR&B master cleanse aesthetic af forage. Meditation jean shorts poke deep v dreamcatcher.","Edison bulb artisan street art actually pabst wolf af letterpress tumeric poutine. Next level neutra kinfolk Brooklyn. Seitan 3 wolf moon disrupt PBR&B. Banh mi messenger bag bespoke retro. Man bun succulents health goth bicycle rights taxidermy try-hard, austin knausgaard hexagon next level ethical shabby chic food truck bruh.","Mumblecore ramps lo-fi, ascot organic scenester neutral milk hotel whatever cold-pressed vinyl hell of biodiesel live-edge salvia. Unicorn heirloom blue bottle single-origin coffee. Health goth DIY slow-carb DSA asymmetrical, paleo iPhone big mood grailed plaid photo booth occupy franzen. Big mood ramps messenger bag, vegan bespoke vape trust fund ugh edison bulb fashion axe gatekeep vaporware unicorn bruh direct trade.","Blackbird spyplane man braid iceland lumbersexual vaporware sartorial disrupt. Beard ascot chartreuse mixtape yr health goth, celiac crucifix drinking vinegar marfa. Hammock food truck man braid JOMO, ennui YOLO kale chips copper mug. Cray wolf artisan fashion axe bruh etsy. Venmo yuccie readymade umami microdosing tattooed skateboard.","Lumbersexual salvia retro bicycle rights photo booth solarpunk blue bottle aesthetic kombucha, cray vexillologist kinfolk actually. Hella bitters fanny pack letterpress, etsy truffaut tonx bushwick. Thundercats celiac big mood pork belly tofu kickstarter actually fashion axe air plant edison bulb JOMO twee. Jean shorts before they sold out tousled godard pitchfork pinterest subway tile fanny pack readymade. Truffaut vibecession kombucha jawn."]
{"slip": { "id": 83, "advice": "Put a piece of kitchen roll in with your bag of leaves to make them last longer."}}
{"type":"knock-knock","setup":"Knock knock. \n Who's there? \n Little old lady. \n Little old lady who?","punchline":"I didn't know you could yodel!","id":13}
{"type":"general","setup":"I started a new business making yachts in my attic this year...","punchline":"The sails are going through the roof.","id":67}
{"type":"general","setup":"Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?","punchline":"It was two-tired.","id":421}
{"fact":"Cats have 32 muscles that control the outer ear (compared to human's 6 muscles each). A cat can rotate its ears independently 180 degrees, and can turn in the direction of sound 10 times faster than those of the best watchdog.","length":226}